Why is it that decisions in life are sometimes hard? I'm having to make a decision that will affect the rest of my life.
My OB told me on Friday that he wanted to do surgery to repair the tubal ligation that I had done after Jaidyn was born which had apparently failed. I've had 3 miscarriages in the past year and a few months which my OB felt were tubal pregnancies that had taken care of themselves. If I don't have the surgery to repair them I risk my life as well as the baby's life. The baby obviously wouldn't be able to survive but why risk my life too? I have always felt there was one more child waiting for me and have had confirmation from my Heavenly Father that that was true, but this puts me at a crossroad. Did my child already come and go in those miscarriages? What do I do? As I write this I have tears coming down... Do I take pills, get an IUD? The initial decision to have the tubal ligation weighed heavily on us and we prayed and prayed and went to the temple and we both felt it was right to do. I don't handle pregnancy too well and it really takes a toll on me as well as the baby since they come so early. I really don't know what to do and my heart hurts at this decision. I'm typically not so open because I've always been afraid of judgment, but I'm putting this out there so that maybe I can get some insight as to what to do.
If you're reading this will you say a little prayer for me? Even if you don't know me I could use all the help I can get.