Saturday, November 14, 2009

Life's Decisions: I'm bearing all!

Why is it that decisions in life are sometimes hard? I'm having to make a decision that will affect the rest of my life.
My OB told me on Friday that he wanted to do surgery to repair the tubal ligation that I had done after Jaidyn was born which had apparently failed. I've had 3 miscarriages in the past year and a few months which my OB felt were tubal pregnancies that had taken care of themselves. If I don't have the surgery to repair them I risk my life as well as the baby's life. The baby obviously wouldn't be able to survive but why risk my life too? I have always felt there was one more child waiting for me and have had confirmation from my Heavenly Father that that was true, but this puts me at a crossroad. Did my child already come and go in those miscarriages? What do I do? As I write this I have tears coming down... Do I take pills, get an IUD? The initial decision to have the tubal ligation weighed heavily on us and we prayed and prayed and went to the temple and we both felt it was right to do. I don't handle pregnancy too well and it really takes a toll on me as well as the baby since they come so early. I really don't know what to do and my heart hurts at this decision. I'm typically not so open because I've always been afraid of judgment, but I'm putting this out there so that maybe I can get some insight as to what to do.
If you're reading this will you say a little prayer for me? Even if you don't know me I could use all the help I can get.


Amanda said...

Heather- I wish you the very best in making this decision. We will for sure pray for you guys. I'm not really sure what you should do but I know you should trust your deepest feelings. Have you considered adoption in this equation? I'm sure that if you trust what feels right, it will work out.

Tiff said...

I will pray for you...I wish I had an answer or some magical words to say. Please just follow you gut and listen to the whisperings of the will make the right decision. Wow...I'm sorry your going though this, but it will all work out in the end

T + 2 said...

Oh sweetie I'm so sorry you're facing this tough decision right now. I really know nothing about tubal ligation so I can't offer any kind of advice, but I will certainly keep you in my prayers. Love you Heather!!

Alicia said...

I am sorry you are going thru this. I had a tubal pregnancy and was so scared that since they had to cauterize on of my tubes because of bleeding during surgery that I would not be able to have anymore children. I had 2 more after that with no problems. It was a very scary time and my poor husband was so scared for my life. I guess what I am trying to say is, listen to your heart and what is meant to be will happen. I will pray for you and hope everything works out for the best.